Essentially my children are adults now. The years of driving them from place to place, signing up for extracurricular activities, and encouraging good study skills and school performance are mostly over. It is a new chapter as a parent of adult children--children I love and want the best for. What's important at this new stage?
I've had many good models for parenting adult children in my life. I've had significant and meaningful times with the grown-ups in my life, times I want to replicate with my own children. What will I do?
Share Their Interests
Each of my sons has a myriad of interests similar and different than mine. I've always believed that if you embrace your child's journey, it will take you down roads you never thought you would travel, and if you embrace their journey with positivity and an open mind, you can learn a lot and engage in new and exciting adventures. Hence I look forward to entering the doors of new experiences and life events that my children will bring to me as they live in different places, meet new people, embark on new endeavor, and meet new challenges. I want to make the time to enter their worlds and see it from their points of view. To do this now, we'll visit my children in the places where they live and work. We'll hear the stories of their work commitments and meet the people they work with and recreate with. We'll likely share some good meals at nice restaurants too as we always have our best conversations at events like that, and we'll plan some adventures in beautiful places too.
Talk and Write Regularly
I try to stay in touch with my children at least on a weekly basis--this keeps our knowledge of one another fresh and up to date. I also write to them from time to time when I have something deeper and more meaningful to say. I figure this is an opportunity for them to hear me or ignore me, whatever they choose, I feel this is a good way to impart some of my ideas into their lives. Sometimes I'll share a good news article, blog post, or lesson in life that I think is important.
Learn From Them
No one has the monopoly on knowledge and just because parents have lived longer doesn't necessarily make them all knowing or wiser, so be open minded to learning from your children. See the world through their eyes and experiences and learn.
Have Fun
Know what you all enjoy together. In my family a day at the beach, a simple fresh-food restaurant with a good atmosphere and/or view, and adventures bring us together. We like to hike, swim, bike, and explore new places. We can do that simply with few costs or we can save up for bigger adventures here and there.
Support Each Other's Best Efforts, Commitments, and Contribution
Make time for the sometimes heavy and challenging talks that urge each other forward--promote the best in one another and support each other's ambitions in this way. Recently my greater family had a need that none of the older adults could fulfill. My youngest son was available so he helped out--the task wasn't easy, but it was honorable and a good lesson for my son as he had the chance to truly make a difference in a situation when no one else could be there. We have to be there for one another to help out in times that are challenging and this is an important lesson for families of any ages.
The summer reprieve from a daily teaching schedule gives me time to think about this and time to strengthen our family ties--what else do you do to strengthen your family as your children get older and embark on their lives? What lessons have you learned about this--lessons which have improved the quality of life for you and your loved ones?
I've had many good models for parenting adult children in my life. I've had significant and meaningful times with the grown-ups in my life, times I want to replicate with my own children. What will I do?
Share Their Interests
Each of my sons has a myriad of interests similar and different than mine. I've always believed that if you embrace your child's journey, it will take you down roads you never thought you would travel, and if you embrace their journey with positivity and an open mind, you can learn a lot and engage in new and exciting adventures. Hence I look forward to entering the doors of new experiences and life events that my children will bring to me as they live in different places, meet new people, embark on new endeavor, and meet new challenges. I want to make the time to enter their worlds and see it from their points of view. To do this now, we'll visit my children in the places where they live and work. We'll hear the stories of their work commitments and meet the people they work with and recreate with. We'll likely share some good meals at nice restaurants too as we always have our best conversations at events like that, and we'll plan some adventures in beautiful places too.
Talk and Write Regularly
I try to stay in touch with my children at least on a weekly basis--this keeps our knowledge of one another fresh and up to date. I also write to them from time to time when I have something deeper and more meaningful to say. I figure this is an opportunity for them to hear me or ignore me, whatever they choose, I feel this is a good way to impart some of my ideas into their lives. Sometimes I'll share a good news article, blog post, or lesson in life that I think is important.
Learn From Them
No one has the monopoly on knowledge and just because parents have lived longer doesn't necessarily make them all knowing or wiser, so be open minded to learning from your children. See the world through their eyes and experiences and learn.
Have Fun
Know what you all enjoy together. In my family a day at the beach, a simple fresh-food restaurant with a good atmosphere and/or view, and adventures bring us together. We like to hike, swim, bike, and explore new places. We can do that simply with few costs or we can save up for bigger adventures here and there.
Support Each Other's Best Efforts, Commitments, and Contribution
Make time for the sometimes heavy and challenging talks that urge each other forward--promote the best in one another and support each other's ambitions in this way. Recently my greater family had a need that none of the older adults could fulfill. My youngest son was available so he helped out--the task wasn't easy, but it was honorable and a good lesson for my son as he had the chance to truly make a difference in a situation when no one else could be there. We have to be there for one another to help out in times that are challenging and this is an important lesson for families of any ages.
The summer reprieve from a daily teaching schedule gives me time to think about this and time to strengthen our family ties--what else do you do to strengthen your family as your children get older and embark on their lives? What lessons have you learned about this--lessons which have improved the quality of life for you and your loved ones?