All of us deal with detractors now and then in life. In a sense, I dealt with detractors from my earliest days since my ways of thinking and what I enjoyed were somewhat different than those of my closest relatives. What I truly enjoyed was not the first choice of my parents, siblings, or most of my friends. Hence, I spent a lot of time in my own imaginary world which included the music, theater, films, stories, thoughts, and lifestyle I was interested in and dreamed of. In time, I found contemporaries that shared my interests, and still today I am seeking to know myself better and embed myself in the worlds where I belong.
Detractors are those that don't support who you are, what you believe, and/or what you do. Some relatives would say, "Go out and play," when I prefered drawing or watching a movie instead. Others would say, "Don't think too much," when I wanted to contemplate a topic or understand a situation better. There were some who would project who I was and what I would become too with strong statements that didn't fit my dreams or desires. These people projected who they were on me and didn't take who I was seriously.
I took this experience with me as a parent, and instead of detracting from my children's wishes and dreams, I sought to understand each child for who they were. I wanted to know what they loved and were interested in and gave them many chances to try out various life events to see what captured their attention and interest. I wanted my children to be who they were meant to be. I wanted them to know what they loved to do and where they wanted to be. I felt the same way about my students. I didn't expect my students to be all the same, but instead I sought to find teaching/learning ways that spoke to them, inspired them, and helped them to learn the content and about themselves in meaningful, beneficial ways.
I've learned now that we will all have detractors in life, and it's important to consider the detractors' response to you. For example, when a relative would tell me to "go out and play," they didn't support my desire to dream, write, draw, watch film, but they did help to introduce me to the beauty and inspiration of the natural world. Also, when they told me to "not think so much," I did learn to think about where deep analysis plays an important role and when it's time to put the thinking aside and get busy with good action instead. Lately, detractors related to my writing and share, have helped me to think about what good writing and share include--they've helped me to think more about audience and the effects that communication has on others, good and bad.
The truth is that detractors can play an important role in honing and refining who you are and what you believe in. They can be the sandpaper that helps to smooth out your edges and define who you are. And, as with all things, we have to understand when detractors can play a positive role and when we have to leave detractors by the wayside as we go about doing the good work possible and answering the calls we hear about who we are and what we need to and want to do in life. Onward.