Soon we'll drive my youngest son back to college. We're taking a leisurely route, one that includes a few meals together in beautiful settings which will give us time to have a few good discussions about his college year ahead. What will we emphasize?
Be healthy
We'll encourage our son to have a healthy outlook and healthy routine. We'll discuss the implication of alcohol, and how that can set one back. We'll talk about the threat of drugs. We'll discuss healthy food, snacks, and activity. Above all, we want our son to have a healthy year.
Study
College is a huge investment of time and money. We want our son to get the most out of his college days. We want him to have a positive study routine which includes attending class, seeking a professor's or classmates' help if needed. Staying on top of his homework, projects, and other assignments. He did a great job in this regard freshman year, may it continue.
What you do is what you become
I want to talk with him about the investments he makes, investments of time, money, relationships. I want him to understand that the decisions he makes affect the person he becomes. We've talked a lot about this in the past and will continue the conversation.
Personal Responsibility
Every year we read stories in the news about college kids who don't look out for themselves or others. I want to talk to my son about his personal responsibility for his own self care as well as the care of his friends and classmates. This means not letting a friend drink too much, leave a party alone, or face grave struggle without getting help. Too often college kids turn a blind eye to a friend who is struggling, and while I don't expect my son to be able to help all of his classmates, I do expect him to act if someone needs help. He can alert authorities, provide a friend with helpful contacts, or simply stay by a friend's side if there's trouble.
Personal responsibility also includes the responsibility to do the right thing, and the responsibility to know that your actions matter.
Contribute and help others
I'd like to see my son make some time to help others in the general school community. I hope he'll be on the look out for an opportunity to do that. Perhaps he and his teammates from his college sports team can work together to contribute to the community in a meaningful way.
Spend wisely; work if needed
My son worked hard this summer to earn money for college spending. I want him to spend his money wisely, and if need be, work a part time job to make a few more dollars. Last year he had a part time job that not only afforded him spending money, but provided him with valuable education about, and supports within, the college community.
Summer Internship
My son wants a paid internship next summer so we'll likely strategize about the steps he needs to follow in order to get a good internship, steps that include visiting the college career office and having them help out with his resume creation, cover letters by the end of October, identifying good internships, and applying for those internships on time.
Foster good relationships
College is generally a time when a lot of good relationships are made. I want my son to understand this and nurture the good, healthy relationships that he makes. There's a lot to learn and enjoy about one another, and college is a great time to broaden your horizons with countless interesting friendships and deeper relationships.
Have fun
I placed this at the bottom of the list since my son gravitates towards fun so this won't be a challenge, but I want him to know that it's okay to have fun too. College can be a great time in life if you meet that opportunity with a sense of personal responsibility, friendship, hard work, and fun too.
I can imagine some reading this list and stressing over the number of topics, but as we meander towards my son's college, we'll likely tackle these topics a little at a time during car rides, sitting on the beach, at dinner, hiking, exploring local museums, and as we take part in local cultural events.
Be healthy
We'll encourage our son to have a healthy outlook and healthy routine. We'll discuss the implication of alcohol, and how that can set one back. We'll talk about the threat of drugs. We'll discuss healthy food, snacks, and activity. Above all, we want our son to have a healthy year.
Study
College is a huge investment of time and money. We want our son to get the most out of his college days. We want him to have a positive study routine which includes attending class, seeking a professor's or classmates' help if needed. Staying on top of his homework, projects, and other assignments. He did a great job in this regard freshman year, may it continue.
What you do is what you become
I want to talk with him about the investments he makes, investments of time, money, relationships. I want him to understand that the decisions he makes affect the person he becomes. We've talked a lot about this in the past and will continue the conversation.
Personal Responsibility
Every year we read stories in the news about college kids who don't look out for themselves or others. I want to talk to my son about his personal responsibility for his own self care as well as the care of his friends and classmates. This means not letting a friend drink too much, leave a party alone, or face grave struggle without getting help. Too often college kids turn a blind eye to a friend who is struggling, and while I don't expect my son to be able to help all of his classmates, I do expect him to act if someone needs help. He can alert authorities, provide a friend with helpful contacts, or simply stay by a friend's side if there's trouble.
Personal responsibility also includes the responsibility to do the right thing, and the responsibility to know that your actions matter.
Contribute and help others
I'd like to see my son make some time to help others in the general school community. I hope he'll be on the look out for an opportunity to do that. Perhaps he and his teammates from his college sports team can work together to contribute to the community in a meaningful way.
Spend wisely; work if needed
My son worked hard this summer to earn money for college spending. I want him to spend his money wisely, and if need be, work a part time job to make a few more dollars. Last year he had a part time job that not only afforded him spending money, but provided him with valuable education about, and supports within, the college community.
Summer Internship
My son wants a paid internship next summer so we'll likely strategize about the steps he needs to follow in order to get a good internship, steps that include visiting the college career office and having them help out with his resume creation, cover letters by the end of October, identifying good internships, and applying for those internships on time.
Foster good relationships
College is generally a time when a lot of good relationships are made. I want my son to understand this and nurture the good, healthy relationships that he makes. There's a lot to learn and enjoy about one another, and college is a great time to broaden your horizons with countless interesting friendships and deeper relationships.
Have fun
I placed this at the bottom of the list since my son gravitates towards fun so this won't be a challenge, but I want him to know that it's okay to have fun too. College can be a great time in life if you meet that opportunity with a sense of personal responsibility, friendship, hard work, and fun too.
I can imagine some reading this list and stressing over the number of topics, but as we meander towards my son's college, we'll likely tackle these topics a little at a time during car rides, sitting on the beach, at dinner, hiking, exploring local museums, and as we take part in local cultural events.