It is important to find ways to break that wall down in positive ways. In the deepest of hurtful events, it is unlikely that the wall will come down quickly, but instead it takes one active step forward at a time to crumble the wall. These steps are typically greater if they are action steps rather than word-steps alone. In cases like these, the old adage, actions speak louder than words, is true.
What can we do to break down the walls of hurt, hate, and pain? What actions matter?
Send a card or letter
While words alone will not make better, the active step of sending a card or letter shows that you mean what you say.
Acts of kindness
Do something to make the individual's life better--send a gift card for dinner, make a dozen cookies and deliver the treats, invite the person to an event they'll enjoy, mow their lawn. . . There's an endless list of kind and loving acts possible when it comes to serving one another.
Own your error
In situations of pain and hurt, typically all parties own the situation to some degree. It is important to honestly own your part in the situation.
For those of us who seek a more just, loving, and good world, it has been a discouraging week, but we can't let that stop our momentum for making better. Instead we have to embrace loving action and direction to continue to work for betterment. Onward.