Big shifts in life prompt us to ponder what matters.
It matters that you live your own life, and let others live their own lives too.
My mom always preached this truth. Yet, sometimes it's difficult to let others live their lives as they do. Sometimes we see friends or family members making choices that we may feel are detrimental to their health, livelihoods, family, or others. When this happens, it is very challenging. On one hand, you have to let the people you love live their own lives, but on the other hand, you don't want your friends or family members to harm themselves or others.
Sometimes friends and family members may judge, criticize, or react negatively to your life choices--they may not agree with you and how you live. When this happens, it is important to recognize the truth of the matter. If a friend or family member overtly or subtedly lets you know that an aspect of your lifestyle is not positive to you or others, you may want to make a change to empower your life. That happened to me recently. A family member inferred that something I do is less than positive. The family member was right and I'm working to revise that action for the better--it's not a critical point, but it's also not an easy action to change, but I'm working on it.
Way back, I remember when I got upset when so many of my good friends were choosing lifestyles different than mine. These changes impacted our friendships in significant ways. I always wish I was wiser about these changes recognizing that changes like these happen. Just recently one of my children discussed a similar shift in his friend group. I was able to share my experience with the advice that he think about what it is that he really enjoys about those friends and make that a priority when they get together. I noted that he doesn't have to take part in the aspects of their lives that no longer fit his lifestyle or interests now.
So my resolve is to happily let friends and family members live their own lives, and also live my own life too. Life takes many twists and turns, and as life changes, friendships and relationships will change too. You don't have to lose those friendships and relationships, but instead, you can recalibrate those connections in ways that matter. Onward.