Not too long ago I critiqued a situation. I tried to be sensitive with my critique, and I thought a lot about it. As one might imagine, the critique was met with anger and critique aimed at me. The critique given to me was true--I accepted it. That critique was not surprising, but it was surprising to me that the individual could not accept my critique as an attempt to be helpful, not hurtful. After the event, little was said again.
Recently, however, the area I originally critiqued became apparent again in a potentially harmful way. Had my original attempts to relay information been accepted, I would mention this situaiton, but given the fact that the critique was not accepted, and the truth that I don't know all factors related to the situation, I am not going to speak up this time. I'll keep my place.
I write about this today because I want to remind myself that it is good to be open to critique. While no one looks forward to critique, critique can save you a lot of heartache. As an educator, I always shared critique with parents if I thought it would help a child now and into the future. Over the years I watched how a lot of children grew over time--I noticed success and struggles. There were clear patterns related to success and clear patterns related to struggle. One pattern that clearly related to struggle was a pattern of not dealing with childhood issues early on, but instead letting those issues fester or not owning the issues at all. When this happened, the issues didn't go away, but typically became worse as a child got older. For families that dealt with childhood issues, there was a clear pattern of success for those children. Problems untended usually become greater.
I try to listen for critique in conversation, then deal with it. People often notice aspects of your life that you may not notice. That said, no one knows it all and that's why critique always has to be shared with the fact that you may be wrong or there may be aspects of the situation which you are not aware of. In the end, to be open to critique is to help yourself develop in positive ways, and that's a good direction to take. Onward.