Probably like most people, I ache when I see or hear of others who struggle. While I know that struggle is part of life, it hurts to see people experience that.
Recently a friend described a struggle he experienced. I said, Why didn't you call me, I could have helped? He said he didn't want to bother me. In truth, I would have been honored if he called me, and I did have the answer to the small, but bothersome problem, he faced.
When I see someone struggle, I want to fix it, but it's rarely possible to simply solve the struggles you observe. Over time, I've seen many struggles and in most cases, I also got to witness the struggle's positive resolve. So as I watch people struggle, I remind myself of those stories of struggles happily resolved. These struggles included people looking for loving relationships, people suffering from addiction, people experiencing problems at work, people hoping to have babies, people dealing with the death of a loved one, and people who wanted to have enough money to buy a home. These struggles were real and painful for people, and when they were in the thick of the struggle, it seemed like there would be no resolve. Yet, in almost every case, a better day came--they weathered the storm.
I remember when I was a teenager and faced a struggle. My dad shared stories with me of others who faced a similar struggle and met with a good resolve. Those stories gave me strenth at a time of sadness.
What can we do for people we care about who struggle? When I've struggled, these simple acts have helped a lot:
- Reach out to say hello, offer companionship, and share a good time
- Divert the focus from the problem to other, more gratifying activities and topics of living
- Include the person in an effort to help someone else
- Simply be present and available
- Help as you can in positive ways