Sometimes we forget to recallibrate our relationships. We act as if nothing has changed when so much has changed with regard to age, experience, interests, and more. This makes me realize that we regularly have to recalibrate who we are together and what we expect from each other.
This fact is clearly evident in our relationships with our children. In each stage there is a need to recalibrate who we are together, what we do, and how we communicate. As parents, we can easily forget that we are no longer in charge of our young adult children's lives--once they are adults, the way they live and what they choose is up to them. We can be there as consults if they desire that, and we can possibly offer our advice respectfully, but it's their lives and we must respect that as we develop an adult-to-adult relationship with them.
In marriage, we have to recalibrate our relationships regularly. While in many ways we remain the same people who married each other long ago, in other ways we've changed significantly and have to adjust to that too. Simply talking about your hopes and wishes can help you to update your relationship, and compromise goes a long way as you age together. New adventures brings energy and renewal to close relationships like too.
Sibling relationships require regular recalibrating too. What you may have accepted from a brother or sister in the past, may not be acceptable today. And, the way you treated your older or younger siblings may no longer be beneficial or welcome. We have to continually get to reknow each other as we grow, change, and build our lives with new partners, children, and others.
Every opportunity to do something special with one another is an opportunity to renew an existing relationship in ways that matter. I want to think more about this as I plan and engage in many events with loved ones in the days ahead.