I remember a situation when I worked very hard to make change in a professional sphere. I wanted to make that change because I thought it would be a positive strategy for a particular type of learner. I read a lot about it and saw many good reasons to make this change. I worked tirelessly to make the change with little, if any, success. Eventually I gave up my advocacy in this area since I saw no way to gain success, and what I would lose if I pursued the change anymore was great--the cost of that loss would have hurt me, others and the greater focus of my professional work. It was time to give up.
Now, I'm in a similar situation. I have done a lot of research and put a lot of effort into this work, but clearly what I have done has not been successful. My work, in many ways, has created greater stress, angst, and distance between and amongst many. That was never the intent, but surely the outcome. I don't agree with the process at play, but my efforts to make change have been unsuccessful and hurtful, and now similar to the situation I describe at the top of the page, the ramifications of my efforts have begun to spill over and affect other areas of my life--areas of life dear to me and more important to me. Clearly, it is time to wave the white flag, step back, and accept defeat.
I will never be sorry for the work I've done including the research, advocacy, time-on-task, and care. All that I know pointed me in this direction even though there was little to no support and plenty of ridicule and disrespect for my efforts. In the best of circumstances the situation would have profitted from good process, apt communication, and collaboration--I'm sure I made many missteps unknowingly, but that was never my intent. The intent of my efforts were solid, but clearly my actions did not result in the kind of teaming and work I hoped for.
This is the end of one chapter of life and the start of a new chapter. There is always a bit of sadness at a chapter's end as there is excitement in a chapter's start. There are no regrets as I did my best at each juncture. Onward.