There comes a time when you simply have to put the pain behind you. Yes, that is easier said than done, but some pain at some points simply becomes too burdensome and onerous to hold on to, and it is time to let go. Obviously, if you perpetrated some or all of that pain, hopefully you learned a lesson and will use it to not create that kind of pain again. In some ways, that gives the pain you experienced meaning.
How do you put that pain behind you?
I believe that will differ depending on the type of pain, the role you played with regard to the pain, and what you've learned from the painful experience.
Some potential ways, however, to put that pain behind you include the following:
- Create a concluding statement such as these:
- My words, _____________, created a painful situation, and I will not use that phrase again.
- That pain derived from people's insensitivity, ignorance, and anger--from now own, when I face similar actions/statements, I will simply respond by _______________________.
- I unknowingly stepped into a hornet's nest of sensitivity, anger, pride, and hate--that will happen. I don't own others' destructive and dehumanizing behavior, but if I can help to quell the harm and bring peace to the matter, I will.
- It was a messy situation, we all learned a lot--it's past, it's over, it's time to move on.
- Say the concluding statement whenever the pain begins to creep back in.
- Turn the energy created by the pain into acts of kindness, goodness, and support.
- Spend a little more time taking care of yourself and shoring up the weak spots that allowed the painful incident and resulting hurt to affect you.
There's a lot of good living out there, and once you've learned and applied the lessons the pain brought forth, it's time to embrace the good living possible. Onward.