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| A collage of family weddings |
Since I'll attend a wedding soon, I'm reflecting on the day I got married.
The best decision I made prior to my wedding was the decision to go out to brunch with my husband-to-be the day before the wedding to discuss our expectations for the event. Like drawing a line in the sand, that brunch was the dividing line between the preparation and planning for the ceremony and the start of the loving, celebratory weekend.
After the brunch, we drove up to my family's home and began celebrating. The first celebration was a rehearsal dinner that my mother-in-law put on. She was a woman who had a great sense of design, and I remember that the tables were beautifully arranged and the dinner well planned. It was at a local hotel. I loved the pink silk dress I wore for that event. I was so happy.
The next morning I went to a hair stylist that did my hair and make-up--she did a great job! Then back to our small family home to get ready. A relative took pictures of my mom, the bridesmaids and me that morning. Then we all walked down the street to the church where we married.
That church had always been very special to me. My home sat three houses away from the church and throughout my life that church was a cornerstone of special events and spirituality. I have so many memories of my days at that church, memories that include the first time I learned about God. We sat in the windowed rectory room, and my CCD teacher told us that God is everywhere. I remember the sunlight shining through the window and my thinking that God was that sunlight--since that time when I was about six years old, I've connected the idea of God with sunlight, brightness and warmth. At the church, I also celebrated my First Communion and Confirmation. There were the baptisms and other sacraments for my five younger siblings too. Family member weddings took place in the church as well as my attendance at Mass each Saturday or Sunday and every holiday. During Easter week, I remember fondly attending all the special services with my grandmother. I borrowed a prayer book from the church once that brought me great insight, insight that changed my life, and I belonged to our CYC which offered me many wonderful and enjoyable adventures as well as camaraderie. I also volunteered as a nursery worker which I loved, and looked forward to the yearly Bayberry Fair, a fall fair complete with games, craft tables, sweets and other treats. To be married at that church which meant so much to me was very special.
I worried about my husband-to-be showing up. I had read too many stories about missing grooms or brides on the morning of their weddings, but once I arrived at the church and spied my husband-to-be at the back of the church, I relaxed. In the church sat so many relatives and friends--my parents invited 400 people to my wedding because they wanted to make sure that all of my cousins, aunts, uncles and friends were there. Over my life, I spent so many happy times with all of those people that I was overjoyed to have them there. My college friend Ruth sang beautiful songs. Another friend, Jackie, gave a reading. My friends and relatives Amy, Kathy, Sue, Chrissy and Deb were bridesmaids and my husband's and my friends and relatives were ushers. Dad walked me down the aisle, and during the ceremony my husband and I both cried--it was a very spiritual, emotional time.
We walked back to my neighbor's yard for pictures and then drove to a nearby country club for the reception. We picked a great band we heard at a jazz concert at The Esplanade. While talented, unfortunately they didn't know a lot of songs--but people danced a lot and the jazz was wonderful. After the reception, we returned to my parents' backyard to continue the celebration and then we took off for a hotel room in Boston--we were very happy. The next day we played ball with friends--I was definitely emotional that day as there was a little let down, and then we took off for a 16-day honeymoon to Paris and Turkey. It was an amazing honeymoon adventure that included all kinds of lodging from tent-like spaces to fancy hotels. We hiked, explored historic sites, met lots of interesting people, swam and adventured. I LOVED it!
Our wedding was a terrific celebration--one that helped to ground our now 33-year marriage. So as I attend the wedding soon, I'll remember back to that special day and wish this couple similar joy, happiness and love. Onward.