When I was young most of the moms were home taking care of the children, the home, the husbands, the neighbors and volunteering at school, church and more. These women were doing incredible work to keep the community strong. They were helping sick neighbors, supporting the working moms, and keeping watch and care over the entire neighborhood while most of the adult men went off to various work obligations.
During the first few years of my professional career as a teacher I saw the shift from women-at-home to mostly working women/moms. When I first started teaching in the 80's it was rare for a child to have a working mom, but by the time I retired it was rare for a child to have a mom at home.
As a working mom myself, I have not issue with moms working, but I do wonder if we've neglected the value of quality homemaking and the time that takes. When all the women went to work, who was left to care for the community? Did we forget to create time for community care, and are we paying the price for that miss now?
I believe that many in the community suffer due to the fact that so many adults are busy working rather than having the time to rightly care for themselves and their loved ones. I believe the answer to this is not to go back to a time when women were in the home and men were working, but instead to create societal structures that provide men and women the time they need to foster good homes and communities and work too. How can we do that?
First, we must ensure that people who work make a fair wage. And, we have to make sure that people who work have reasonable schedules--the kinds of schedules that allow them to care for and enjoy their families and communities too. Not only is there a great wage and income gap today, but there is a significant time gap too leaving some with adequate time/money to care for their families and others with little to no time to care for and enjoy their families.
Lately, I've been thinking about what it takes to help people thrive, and I believe that warm, welcoming homes and peaceful, lively, happy communities are two constructs that help people thrive. In part, I believe that the mental health crisis in America is due to the break down in communities, and the answer is not to go back in time, but instead to reimagine what communities look like when people have lifestyle choices, respect, adequate income, good time, positive support and the kinds of naturally beautiful and supportive environments that foster best possible living and health.
We can work for this, and if we do, our children and grandchildren will thank us for it.