I was sitting in a very clean and orderly funeral home in a small town not far away from where I live. There was a lot of love in the room. Sadly a family member dropped dead without warning in the middle of the day alone in his home. The death was shocking. Yet, at the wake, family member after family member trickled in to pay their respects and show support. In talking with these beloved folks, one after another mentioned that we shouldn't just see each other at funerals, there's got to be a better way.
Before and after that sad occasion, people talked often of getting a family reunion going, and there have been a few attempts since that time to gather the relatives from our very big, loving family--a family that shares many warm, happy memories over the years. The challenge with these reunions is mostly the size of our family--there are literally hundreds of us, too many for almost any venue. Plus we live all over the United States with one or two world travelers too. And most of us are very busy with our own families, jobs and communities. How can we show solidarity, enjoy each other's company, share the memories at times other than wakes and funerals--what can we do?
With a deep interest in family history, I started a Facebook page to share facts, images and stories of our big, mostly European-American lineage. Many relatives joined the page and have shared stories as well. Our parents and grandparents put a lot of energy into the good times we shared as children and those memories are the glue that hold us together. Those that came before us give us strength too as they were hard working, fun loving, good people who raised big families and overcame many challenges. There were struggles over the years too--struggles that remain in some parts of the family and struggles that profit from understanding the roots of those challenges and how we can make better.
The Facebook page provided a stage for regular family "reunion" with photos, stories and announcements and now we've set two times a year for a come-if-you-can reunions to share stories, enjoy each other's company and rekindle the past warmth and camaraderie that was a mainstay of our childhoods. One reunion is at the holidays for the women in the family and one is at a beach in the summer for anyone who can make it. Everyone is invited and all that's required is that you bring some food for yourself or to share. This is one way to keep our closeness and history alive in places of joy rather than just places of sadness.
I believe that these kinds of reunions bring strength to our children too as it lets them know that they belong to a long history that is greater than themselves and that there are a lot of people out there that love them and are ready and willing to help them if they can. This sense of belonging is important to good lives, and knowing your ancestry is one way to give you a sense of place and being that helps you to bring forward the good that you received. Onward.