It is very painful to lose a friend not to death but due to a friend's choice. Why do we lose friends? Can we regain the friendships?
In the past few years, my life has endured significant change on all fronts and in some ways, these changes have resulted in lost or damaged friendships--why? In many ways, prior to these changes, my life was on the fast track. There was rarely a minute's rest and less time to recognize the details of life all around me. With more time to notice all of life's details, I noticed some behaviors that were not evidence of a strong and supportive friendships. Acknowledging this to myself and others was definitely hurtful to some relationships. Should I have stayed silent? I don't think that would have been the right way to go, but I do think I could have addressed the issues at hand with greater finesse and skill--that would have helped me to continue the friendships in new ways. Yet, perhaps the friendships were meant to wane, perhaps the change in connection was a natural evolution. I'm not sure.
For the most part, I believe it is good to do what needs to be done to hold on to friendships, but I also realize that friends sometimes need to take a vacation from one another, and it's good to give friends that needed time. As we walk down the road of life, some will stay with us for long periods of times and others will stay for just one short time or short times now and then. Life continually evolves and we evolve with it. That's true of friendships too.
So to do your best by friends in every way is a positive approach, and to realize that even when we do our best, some friendships will wane or disappear is positive as well. Onward.