I noticed recently that many were ready and wiling to support a loved one who is at a very positive place in life. Just to be around this individual makes you feel good--everyone wants a piece of this positivity. That's natural.
This is the reason that candidates surround themselves with positive, popular people--people are attracted to the good energy of positive, popular people.
On the other hand, when people are down and out, there's much less support. Few want to connect themselves to the negativity, troubles, anguish or struggle of people who are compromised. Of course, good people do their time trying to help with as much positivity and good will possible, but in general, people who struggle are often left out of the good energy and support possible in life.
Fortunately in American society, there are many supports available for challenged people. Many would rightly argue that the supports are insufficient and can be better, and I agree with that. There's so much more we can do for people who struggle in all kinds of ways, but there's also many good agencies and programs that help those that struggle which is good.
We all have to be cognizant of this reality. We have to check ourselves in ways that evaluate whether we're just putting our support behind those who succeed rather than balancing our support for those who are successful as well as those that struggle. Some may argue that we should shift the majority of our support to strugglers rather than those enjoying success. I believe that equation depends on who you are and who you are connected to as well as your long term vision.
Clearly it's easy and attractive to embrace those who are successful and meet society's definitions of attractive and positive. And, it's often challenging to support those who are challenged amongst us and those who do not fit society's definition of attractive, acceptable or likable.
Considering best possible care and support schedules for strugglers is a good way to move your support to greater balance. What can you do for those in your midst who face challenge, and what agencies can help you to meet these individuals' needs for inclusion, care, happiness and health? How much time and energy can you spare to help others, and what kind of time and energy do you need to positively live your life for yourself and others in your midst?
There are not clear equations to support those in your midst that are challenged? The time, energy and resources you expend is a personal matter that has many intimate and detailed considerations. In general, however, it's good to ensure that you're simply not moving in the direction of positive and popular rather than needy and struggling. Find the balance with regard to who you support and how you do that. Also remember that those who struggle have personal capacity to help themselves too, and it's important to help them utilize that capacity for self-help as that alleviates their need for care and also enriches their independence and self confidence. Onward.