What creates an impasse?
I thought about this today as I studied current impasses and thought about how to avoid impasses too.
Thinking about impasses, I realized that one cause can be too-busy, exhaustive schedules. When you're tired and busy, you may not be as thoughtful as possible, and sometimes impasses are created by a lack of good thought and attention.
Impasses can also be caused by neglecting to think about the bigger picture and what's most important. You may have a falling out or disagreement about something small while you forget about the bigger, more important issues and commitments at play.
Then, of course, there are impasses that are created because the issues connect to the most significant parts related to who you are and what you do--these are very sensitive, emotional issues that can affect you deeply.
In general, impasses are not positive experiences--it's difficult to disagree and hard to navigate disagreements. What can you do?
First, it is important to think about the big, important issues involved. Connecting around the bigger, common commitments or beliefs can be a good way to move beyond the small matters that may have created an impasse. For example, I recently experienced an impasse with regard to some small matters, yet I share a lot of really important, valuable beliefs and interests with the people involved. It's better to focus on our common beliefs and interests rather than the small matters that separate us.
Next, compromise and acceptance are important. We're not going to agree with everyone and everyone is not going to agree with everything we value and believe in either. Hence, we've got to make space for compromise and acceptance with regard to disagreements.
And, of course, it's good to focus on supporting one another in ways that we can. What good can we do for one another? How can we help one another? In what ways can we understand each other better and support each other's similarities and differences.
In general, good connections are better than worrisome and frustrating impasses, and there's work we can do to make this happen. Onward.