Have you ever ceded your authority or capacity? And if so, why?
I've done that too many times in life, and every time that's happened I regretted it. Why did I do it?
First of all, it starts when I notice something, and that something doesn't feel right. Typically what I notice is outside of my realm of expertise and more a situation of intuition and general knowledge. For example, while teaching, I'd notice things that just didn't seem right. At first, I was reluctant to speak up because the situation was outside of my realm of authority or expertise, but almost every time I stayed silent, the situation turned into a nightmare. I regretted that I didn't speak up when I saw something suspicious and seemingly troubling occur. I learned to speak up sooner than later, and I never regretted that at school.
I used this lesson in other areas of my life as well, and again, did not regret speaking up sooner than later. I learned to trust my intuition, and though I wasn't always or totally right, typically speaking up was the right move, a move that avoided catastrophe or lesser problems.
Recently, however, in an area outside of my expertise and experience, I found myself very uncomfortable. I didn't speak up, and now I have regrets. Rather than staying silent and just going along with someone's plan, I should have done the research myself in order to make an educated decision. The result will not be a catastrophe, but it won't be ideal either. I'll have to live with the expensive consequences of a less-than-desirable decision. Lesson learned.
So what to do in the future?
First, when a problem, decision or issue seems uncomfortable, take that discomfort seriously as it is a signal that the problem, decision, or issue is not alright--something more or different should be done to make you comfortable.
Next, use time as an advantage. Take the time to research the issue at hand. For me related to the current issue, I was afraid to confront the issue for a number of reasons. Yet, looking back, I have the research skills and experience that would have led to a more reasonable, desirable decision. I should have trusted my instinct and done the research, rather than simply going along with a plan I didn't know enough about.
Once you research, sit down with the decision makers and review all the information as well as the details related to the decision. There will likely need to be compromises to please all those involved, but there's also likely to be a better overall plan and decision.
Onward.