I thought about my parenting style this morning, and I would describe that style as "led by dreams." I had many dreams for my children and those dreams led me forward when it came to the choices I made as a parent. What were those dreams and how did those dreams lead me?
Be yourself
I really wanted my children to be who they were meant to be. When they were born, I had few expectations for who they would become. I did expect them to be good people who did their best in life for themselves and others, but as far as specific pastimes, professions, and lifestyle, I had few to no expectations. I saw parenting as a discovery process where I tried out many avenues with my children to see what interested them and who they wanted to be. I watched them lean in some directions and reject others. I supported lots of trial and error as they found what it was that they wanted to do and who they wanted to become. This is a lifelong journey--one I want to continue to support for each of my children.
Education
I believe that a good education lays a strong foundation for good living. I wanted my children to have a strong education and did what I could to support that.
Live a good life for self and others
I want my children to live good lives, and I will speak up if I see them making decisions or going down roads that I feel are not good for them or others. I want my children to be honest, helpful, kind, generous, caring, and good people. I believe that when we seek to live our best lives for ourselves and others, we will lead best possible lives.
Struggle and hardship happens
I hate to think of my children experiencing struggle or hardship of any kind, but struggle and hardship happen, and when they face times like these, I want to be there to support them and to help them direct their energy in other, more positive directions. I'm a fan of energy management, and believe that we always have to think about the energy we have and where we direct that energy. So as the famous quote from film, The Sound of Music, directs us, "When a door closes, a window opens" meaning seek the promise in the problem.
Prioritize
No one can be or do all things. We all have limitations of some kind. These can be limitations of time, money, energy, health, and more. Yet, despite our limitations, we have capacity, and when we prioritize how we use our time and energy, we live better lives.
Build positive relationships
We need relationships to live good lives. When we foster good relationships, we can rely on one another for insight, support, positive challenge and good times. It's important to seek and find the kind of people that help us live the good lives we desire.
Let dreams lead you
Make time to dream. Dream about your own aspirations and the aspirations your children have as well. How might you support their aspirations--how can you live a life that meets the dreams you have for yourself and others? Let dreams lead you. Take time to detail those dreams in writing, speaking, or drawing. Dreams give us the energy, insight, and direction we need to live good lives. Onward.