I struggled with my Mom who suffers from dementia recently. I couldn't seem to make her happy. In fact, I was making her upset as I tried to help her with her personal care. Then I noticed her eyeing me eating a dish of coffee ice cream. I remembered that she liked coffee ice cream and asked her if she'd like some. She said no. Yet, she continued eyeing me while I enjoyed this summer treat, and that's when I decided to make her a coffee ice cream frappe. I found the blender, made the frappe, put a bright red straw into it and gave it to her. She LOVED it!!!! Finally, a look of contentment crossed her face. That made a world of difference for me after a couple of days of struggling to make a good connection.
When we struggle with those we love and care for, it's time to look for the words, and more importantly, the actions that will connect us.
What is it that your loved ones love to do, see or hear? How can you support that with and for them? As I engage in a number of chores today, I'll think about that as a life of warm, positive connections is a good life. Onward.