I thought about one of my dream areas this morning and as I did, I cautioned myself to be more realistic than idealistic. Ideally, in this care taking arena of life, I'd like to meet every wish and dream of my loved ones, but realistically, that's impossible, so I had to think of what a realistic goal is related to their care. What can I do?
Realistically a good care taking routine includes the following:
- A schedule of regular, needed personal care, meal preparation, housekeeping, social opportunities
- A team of caretakers that share the daily tasks, work together, and inform each other about the important information and needs.
Realistically what is my role within that good care taking routine?
- Updating weekly medication boxes
- Doctor's appointments
- Veteran's Association appointments, services
- Supplies
- Some housekeeping
- Troubleshooting with other caretakers
- Social opportunities
- Regular check-ins
- Positivity, teamwork, open-mindedness, acceptance
The greatest challenge in this sphere is the desire for perfection when the reality is that there's no such thing as perfection in this challenging role--what I wish for my loved ones at this stage is impossible as I wish for the times of old, times when their health and capacity made them healthy, independent, capable people. Instead they have to rely on others now because their age has taken a toll on their independence, capacity, and health. I have to accept that as that's the way it is. So the goal is best possible living given the circumstances--do what you can to create a best possible situation.
Slowing down and enjoying the strengths, humor, warmth and wisdom they regularly share and display is the goal now. I can do that. Onward.