I have always valued family. Throughout my life I almost always looked forward to our family celebrations, visits by beloved family members, and family adventures. I have tried to do what I can to keep family ties strong and positive over time.
Family ties are challenged at times. I remember way back when one family member's behaviors caused stress, confusion, and worry amongst other family members. Everyone reacted differently to this challenge, a challenge which caused some disharmony, fear, frustration, and hurt. Yet thanks to my parents' dedication to family, we continued our family traditions and remained a close family.
Recently, however, current events and multiple changes have stretched our family commitments and togetherness greatly. Many of these events and changes are natural including the way our family has grown to include many children and their loved ones. Size of the family alone makes it difficult to get together often. Also, family members' lives have taken many diverse paths--the diversity makes our lives interesting to one another, but this diversity also makes it more difficult to get together regularly since everyone's schedules are different and we don't live near each other either. Our individual philosophies and choices about good living have grown to differ too. While we all grew up in the same home, yet we all developed a somewhat different perspective about what it means to live well, and these differences sometimes make it difficult to gather. And together, we are caring for our parents whose capacity to live independently is waning. They need a lot of support, and our beliefs about what that means differs too.
I remain committed to doing what I can to keep family strong and loving, yet I am also committed to changing with the times and recognizing the way our family growth and diversity changes what it means to be a strong, committed, loving family. It's clear we are going to live somewhat different lives, and it's clear that our time together will be far less than the past when our lives, location, and schedules were more similar.
Yet, despite the changes, I am committed to the following:
- When a family member has a need, I want to help if I can
- I will do what I can to assist my mother and father as I do believe it is my job to honor my father and mother in ways that I can
- I will respect my siblings' and other relatives' many life choices and paths
- I will not engage in activities that do not represent my essential beliefs and commitments to good living, respect, love, and care.
- I will continually develop my ability to love well and live gracefully
- I will host a number of events each year to bring family members together as one way to keep our connections close