About two years ago I made a decision to devote more time to caregiving for loved ones. At the time, it seemed like devoting more time to this endeavor was the right thing to do. I'm not unhappy with my decision since I have been happy with what I've been able to do. Essentially over the two years, I helped my loved ones organize their home, get needed supplies, celebrate special occasions, access care, and enjoy the company of friends and family members. I've coordinated my efforts with my siblings and other caregivers. During the two years we've dealt with a large number of medical issues, home updates/projects, and family get togethers. Like teaching and parenting, this is a limitless effort--there's always more you can do, and one of the tough parts of the job is creating the kinds of limits which help you balance your time and care in loving, healthy, positive ways.
At this point, one of the most important efforts is to ask my loved one the question, What do you need? That simple questions helps me to pinpoint what to do and when to do it. The other important effort is to ensure that they have what they need to live their best possible lives. I actually uploaded a care checklist online so I could assess my efforts and ensure that they were getting the good care they deserved.
Caregiving for people of any age goes through multiple transitions. With eldercare the transitions are less predictable for novices like me and that's why I love working with agencies that have experts familiar with what people need at this stage of life. Those experts, in many ways, help me to to help those I love. Right now, we're transitioning to a new caregiving team so there's some adjustment as we transition.
As I think about the big picture, the following questions come to mind:
- Are my loved ones safe?
- Do they have what they need to live a happy, comfortable life?
- What can I do to support the situation in positive ways?