When I was a young adult, I used to visit older relatives and feel bad for what I thought of as their boring lives. I felt guilty at the time that my life was so fun-filled and exciting while their lives seemed to me to be a dull routine. I was evaluating their 50-something lifestyles with my 20-something mindset. Now that I'm 50-plus, I can see that my analysis back then was all wrong. I once saw an ad on television that illustrated this concept perfectly. The young college student was trying to reach her parents. She felt bad for them and their empty-nester lives. The commercial clearly illustrated how wrong that young woman's perception was as it showed the parents happily enjoying a bike adventure with their new found freedom.
The message here is that we have to be careful about projecting our mindsets on others as our mindsets and experiences of life are impacted greatly by age, times, and places. What is true of our mindset at our age, place, and time is likely not true of others in another place, time, and age. Of course, as I write this, it seems like this is a simple truth to understand. Yet, as I spend time with my 90+ dad, I try to imagine what his mindset is like. I can get hints from his words and actions, but without experiencing what it's like to be 90+, i can't get a full grasp on that experience.
Now at 50+ I have a much better idea about what my older relatives were experiencing when I thought their lives were dull. At 50+ there's a sense of satisfaction from a good routine, and there's not a need for exciting events all the time. For me, there's a great sense of happiness with regard to the home I've built and the family I love--a kind of satisfaction and happiness that I couldn't fathom as a twenty-something individual who was exploring life in multiple, diverse ways with lots of varying groups of people.
So as we work with others in different times, places, and ages, we have to be cognizant of the differing mindsets at play. We have to understand that we will not fully understand where different people are at, and with this retain as much respect, open-mindedness, and willingness to listen and observe to connect as well as possible.